When should we begin to trust someone in the dating game? I would say it would rely on the depth of the relationship and the trustworthiness of the person in which you are dating, therefore, this can vary from relationship to relationship. The one thing I always keep in mind is that men are very different from women, with their own ideologies as well as theories. I have found that there are men who truly believe women are stupid and will believe their every word. Sometimes things just don't add up, no matter how charming a man portrays things. A woman such as myself will sweetly sit and smile while listening to the "rubble" but do know that inside my head, my brain is going a mile a minute giving out warning's allowing me know, that what was indeed stated is not adding up.
Some warning signs are men who want to date other women, but yet will keep another woman around for pure sexual enjoyment, at least until something better comes along. I must say, women are guilty of this as well, but I feel that if either gender is just honest from the beginning about the way they feel, this scenario is quite acceptable, especially if both parties agree with it, but where this becomes unacceptable, is when someone does not portray that they do not want a relationship while leading the other party on.
When a man is really "into" a woman, he will want to see her. He will not merely call her "here and there" merely to instigate sex. Sometimes women make the mistake of having intimate relationships too soon, for we all know that if you truly want to land a good man, you can not sleep with him right away, most men view this as a warning sign for promiscuity but on the other hand, the man involved within the scenario is no better than the woman who has given herself to him, I feel this behavior is shared by both genders.
It is very hard to trust for most people. Most people today have their own emotional hang-ups as well as past history which consist of abusers or bad situations. I personally respect if a man does not want a relationship and he quite frankly informs me of this. What this does, it allows me to date other potential mates in the hopes of finding the one man who is really into me. What I do not respect is when a man will not relay that his intentions are less than honorable, I find this selfish, if someone is truly a good person, they will be honest from the beginning, for a man or a woman for that matter should not hang onto someone for the mere sexual aspect, it's not fair, everyone deserves to have that special someone in their lives.
I am not stating that if a man is genuinely interested, he will call or want to see a woman twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week. What I am suggesting is that if a man is truly into a woman, he will want to see her, as compared to once a week or when it becomes convenient for him. A lot of women today are working women and when we find someone who we are genuinely interested in, we make time for them, why should a man be allowed to skirt this same responsibility? Dating is not up to merely the "man". I personally feel that if a man is really genuine, he will want to see a woman, for how else can both parties get to know each other? When men start skirting this responsibility, it more times to none represents that he isn't planning on things going further or he is merely keeping a woman around for sexual reasons until another woman comes along who is better in his eyes. Trust is not a given, trust is earned. If men want women's trust, then start behaving in the ways which are deserving, cut out the suspicious behavior, be honest an show genuine interest, until then, trust is not given by most women, for we want to know that we are giving ourselves to someone who deserves that trust, therefore, men need to step up their program which consists of honesty, integrity and good old fashioned interest, without these traits which should exist while dating a potential mate, women are left to wonder and possibly allow some other man into their life who does indeed have these traits.
Do remember that where men might feel they have the upper hand in the "dating game", women are just as calculating and more times to none already know a man's next move, call it intuition, but a woman knows when a man does not want to see her. A woman knows when a man is not really into her, the problem with women is that some are guilty of waiting for the result in which they want, but do remember that there are women out there who always have a backup, and if you as a man are not man enough to step up to the plate and treat these particular women the way in which they know they deserve to be treated, one can rest assured, there are other names in the "black book" as well as on speed dial.
by Nona Nixon
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